ENOUGH

“You’re not good enough

You don’t deserve this

You don’t have what it takes

You aren’t worthy

You aren’t…”

I’m not.
I’m not good enough.  I don’t deserve anything.  Most days don’t have what it takes.  I’m not worthy.

But I am.
I am here.

There’s this whole big world out there that’s trying to sell us all something.  Make-up, Sports cars, Bit-coins, Anti-aging creams, Time.  Everyone has an agenda.  Something to buy, trade, convince that we desperately need what they’re hocking.

But what I am finding more and more is that there’s very little that I truly need.  Shelter, a bed, warm clothes when the temperature drops, food on the table, coffee (lot’s of coffee) and those who I chose to surround myself with (though many have been chosen for me - thank God for that).  I don’t want for much.  I don’t desperately need a new this or that.  Sure, I want things and I’ve had my own rabbit holes into retail therapy.

In my core there is finally a realization that those voices that I started this with - the not good enough, not strong enough - well they can jump off a F’ing cliff.  I’m tired of the voices that I’ve carried in my head directing my path.  Aren’t you?  The misguided sentiments, the false-truths, the LIES that we’ve been told or worse, we tell ourselves.  I won’t listen.  Not anymore.  

It took a lot of loss to finally claim life.  And my spiritual experience is something that I’ve often referenced in these meanderings (this blog).  I shared with someone just recently that I am not me without the hurts.  Yet, I am more than just the pain I’ve suffered, caused, witnessed, trespassed upon others.  I CLAIM LIFE.  Every Damn Day!  

You see in our core, in our inner-most being there is life.  There is more than what the world wants to sell us.  We see it in new babies being born or adopted.  We see it in hearts coming together to do this thing called life as husband and wife.  We find it not in the grocery store tabloids or on Social Media, but in breaths stolen at the break of day or lingering outside on a crisp December evening to watch the stars, sometimes with someone special.  Not in municipalities or religious trappings, but in the heart of regular citizens stopping at a car wreck to give first aid, to help preserve life - for just a little longer. 

<WE ARE ENOUGH>

We are here to exist, not to placate the obsessions of the nouveau-riche or the pompously bloated trillionaire.  But to build community and help others do life - better.  

We work and we play.  We live, and yes, we die.  We are.

So remember, on the worst days, when it all just SUCKS… that there is more.  In a smile shared.   A hug given.  A kind word.

That WE are enough.

~ Peace

The Burtle

Often Fight the Morning

Often fight the morning 
The shadows still fall
Around me as I’m sleeping
And I struggle to make sense of it all

Cool air of early autumn 
Rising wind brings back the thought
Of one year ago
I can’t help but meander
In the battles that I’ve fought

And looking back
There is comfort
In how each and every day 
is one more chance
To rise above my insecurities 
I find hope,
Get up and stand

This day rises before me
The shadows crumble and fall
As I take a breath
Inside of me
There is a hope,
A gentle call…

“You are enough”


11/08/21
clc