Hard to Get

“Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”‭‭

Philippians‬ ‭3‬:‭12‬-‭14‬ ‭NASB1995‬‬

I press on?

Hell, I often do well to just get up and push the button on the coffee maker (which I’ve remedied by getting a fancy-ish programmable one from Walmart).

To press on to the goal of Heaven? I’m working on schedules and checkbooks (yes, I still do an old school type bank register) while trying to not get swallowed whole by the expectations of man and the juxtaposition of figuring out this whole faith thing, a journey I’ve been on my entire life.

But I don’t have to figure the faith thing out.  I believe.  And those two simple words hold power, trust, fear (in God), hope and breath. I’ve been learning more lessons in trust lately.  Trust that he’ll let me fail, if his plan.  That he’ll walk beside me even when I’m so wracked with tears that I can’t see him.  That he’ll whisper when I’m too stubborn to hear.  That he’ll hold me, when I’m still such a child looking for the arms of my father.

If I think too much, it’s impossible to fathom.  If I stop and be still, I find those whispers - echoes of the days he’s been there when I didn’t want to believe.  The day he rescued my soul from the depth of my sickness.

He’s hard to get.  But maybe that’s the point.  It’s not for us to fully understand. And as I often still fight for the answers, he gives the gift of a musician, a friend, a meeting and peace.

My favorite musician (that seems like a trite way of putting it) keeps popping up.  A man who passed before I really knew the depths of his own journey. Rich, thank you for being the constant that gave me a picture of Christ that I can actually ‘get’, even when I don’t get God at all.

So I press on.  To coffee, to work, to being here, in skin until he takes me home.

~ Peace

The Burtle 

Hard to Get - Rich Mullins