WHAT IF AT THE END...

I wrote the song below back around my birthday of this year.  I try not to live a melancholy life, but there is a tinge of searching still in the lyrics.  This life is a journey and it's hoping, striving, pushing through the hard shit that help us find our step.  Find our way to overcome and rise above the life that may not be exactly what we had seen years before.

Funny thing is that through a lot of ups and downs I started to find peace.  I wasn't where I wanted to be, but I was realizing that I'm a FIGHTER!  I'm here and I'm still want more!  

And then three months ago... well that's a story that's been told before my very eyes (just check out Facebook - or just ask me!!).

So check out the lyrics and just know that there is "home" out there.  You just have to have Faith and not give up!

What if at the end

Of all your hopes and dreams

Life just doesn’t look –

Like what you always dreamed

And at the end

Of that really long road

You find another highway

And a long, long way to go

I know,

That we are here

Only for a moment,

And sometimes that moment ain’t clear

I know,

The future sometimes seems

Less than we had hoped for

Less than we had dreamed

What if at the end

You just sit down and cry

Waiting for the moment –

When we lay down and die

Wouldn’t that be tragic

Our life becomes the fool

We can’t find motivation

When we’ve nothing left to do

So I lift my voice

And pray

Oh, if this is real

Just give me another day…

What if at the end

Of this really long road

You look up, and realize

You’re finally home.

2/25/13

clc

His Smile...

He has my smile.

He is tall and lanky and still growing into himself.

He is one of the most precious gifts that I've ever been given. (along with his sis)

He came out a LARGE baby boy (10lb 3oz).

He still has flame red hair and a temper at times.  And he still hugs his dad.

He's a freshman in high school now.

And I love him.

In a recent picture it was pointed out that we share something.  A smile.

I haven't smiled as much in my life as I have over the last year and a half.  I've found more and more peace within myself and it is such a freeing feeling to know that there is laughter and smiles.  I always see a smile on his face.  Even when it's that smile that is pushing my buttons...

He doesn't have the life stress that an adult faces yet.  But he's becoming a young man and surely will face more and more of the decisions that are part of growing up.

I want the best for him.  For there to never be a time when he can't remember how to smile.  For his life to be full and the ability to always crack that smile that reminds me of me. 

He will find his own path.

But he has my smile.

IDLE LIVES

We don't live idle lives.

We move and grow and find ways to improve.

Our passions grow and are made more evident with the movement that drives them.

We reach out and build bigger houses - find better employment.  We cover ourselves with better made garments and we continue to search for more to fulfill our souls.

But sometimes in the mass communication age that we find ourselves living in we can get lost.

Sometimes to improve you have to do the opposite of the crowd.

Take a walk.  Find a moment to cut out all the noise and find some idle time.

Yes, I said idle time.  

Time to soak and to grow in other ways than just the mere material world we live in.

Read a book.

Share a moment laughing with your son and daughter.

Tell someone that they are important to you.

Sit and watch the sunrise.

Share part of your story with someone.

Put the world on hold for just a moment and realize that the memories created in those moments are precious and "priceless".

The Biggest Fan

It's 4 games until the Braves clinch...

The first National League East Pennant in years.  The fans in Washington are fighting for a chance at a wild card spot.

It's September Baseball.

Who's the biggest FAN?

Well, I was always a SMOLTZIE Fan!!!

So who do you root for?  Is it a specific player?  A team that has your heart?

I love sports and think some of our most memorable moments in society can come from them.  Sid's Slide.  Shilling's bloody sock.  The Braves winning the WORLD SERIES!!

But I have found that I'm a fan of someone new.  Someone I'd like to root for through the rough times and the moments of exhilaration.  A Special person.  And I will always try to be Her Biggest Fan!

When we root for another human being.  When we call them our "FAVE".  When we find ourselves wanting them to WIN!  to SUCCEED!  to SOAR!!!  That is when our spirits find they rise like the roar of the crowd at game 7 of the World Series.  

2 outs - bottom of the 9th.  Kimbrel on the mound.  

Strike One...

Strike Two...

Strike Three...

BRAVES WIN!!!! BRAVES WIN!!!!!

WE WIN!

REMEMBER

The men in blue just couldn't give up the fight
As the towering inferno raged, and fell in plain sight
I doubt any of them questioned what to do
They did all that they were trained for, beyond anything they ever knew

How many perished? How many gave their lives?
The battle was at home, As planes exploded in the skies

How many fought back flames, and tried to reach
Souls perishing in front of their eyes, screams rising from the streets
I doubt they ever questioned what to do
They gave their lives, to rescue the surviving few

How many of them didn’t go home that night?

How many little boys never tucked in “goodnight”?

And years have passed, but I remember still

How it felt so surreal, held captive by the fear

Remembering those who wouldn’t get to say goodbye

As they had to watch the ending of their own lives

They will never be forgotten – especially the ones

Who fought to take back the plane, just when terrorists thought they’d won

Remember, remember the boldness, the way they fought

And let the torch of life burn eternal in our hearts

Remember the way the human spirit rises high

Above the ashes – towards victorious light.

9/11/13

clc

Baking a Cake

It is not a curse.  It's more like cooking...

It is a heart that beats.  A longing that brings us great joy, laughter, tears, and even pain.  A belief that we can always rise above the chains that bind.

It is the realization that time passes and we have only one shot at this life - to find what brings us fulfillment and a sense of something more...

It is Love.

But how many just lay down and fall victim to the mundane routine and forget that there is, even in the simplest of ways, more to feel - to experience - to be.

It takes the right ingredients.  Like baking a cake.

Two people.

Time.

Communication.

Openness.

Passion.

Then you have to mix them with just the right "HEAT"!  Knowing when it's just right to take it out of the oven.

An abundance of this is out there.  I know that there are many people who are seeking it.  Wanting to find the 'mix'.

But even with all the right ingredients there is the need to WORK THROUGH the times when all those ingredients just don't seem to be jelling.

Don't give up.  It's worth the time and patience when you can smell the aromas of sweet love and then get to taste all that is ahead...

The Human Condition

We bleed. We breathe.

We fall down and we get up.

We face challenges and we find amazing ways to rise above.

We cry and it is incredible to see how we rally around the fallen with encouragement and support.

The main thing is to live.  Through everything that we face - to find the resolve to continue, and to reap the bountiful blessings ahead of us.

And never forget...