The Gift

I just finished reading "Into the Wild".  The book chronicles the short life of Chris "Alexander Supertramp" McCandless, a young man with a desire to leave civilization and live alone in the Alaskan wilderness.

It was a bitter sweet tome of a man's desire to find some missing piece, something that pulls at the heart and aches to breathe...  Something that I know my own heart has felt.   To walk away from the 'expectations' and 'rules' of our society and forge something blissfully unique and real.  Not just living off the land, but living in a spiritually heightened sense of being.

I find a taste of this when I hike out in the mountains or even just along the trails at Stone Mountain.

It was something that I thought I needed just a short time ago.  To walk away from Atlanta, from family and friends and to forge a new existence among the trees and hills.

And while there is still a need for that existence - - - - it's changed.  Maybe I'm growing up finally.  Maybe it's the two years that led up to a special night and a life-changing week that have turned my heart and my focus...  Instead of giving up on society as a whole, I find myself building bridges.  Starting new adventures and even seeing my life with someone.

The gift I want to give is me.  All I am.  First to my new wife (18 days to go).  Then to my kids - even the possibility of another little one.  And slowly letting my family back into my life.

I still need my time in the woods.  I'm thinking about writing a book.  Just my thoughts on life there versus the life we lead in the urban jungles.  Who knows!  But I do know that this life has been given as a gift and I will keep finding my time in the wild, but also taking each moment that I spend with Jenelle, my kids - those I care about as part of the experience.

McCandless' story ended alone.  I won't say more than that, look it up!  I want to share what I am - who I am with those who will listen.  Keep a conversation going with those that share my heart.  Keep breathing and giving!!

 

State of the Union

Spent the better part of last week roaming the Nation's Capital.  It had been years since I'd been there.  But not the first time I spent time alone in D.C.

I don't roam to be alone.  But it is a time when I feel the adventure of walking through somewhere new - to experience it without any guide - savor new surroundings.  I love those moments.  But I realized that there is a need to share this.  To find companionship that sometimes takes your hand and walks some of those miles with you.

So I walked through new parts of the city - camera at hand, thoughts toward all that brought me here.  This trip.  This time to roam - but not totally alone this time.

Dr. Seuss wrote a book (one of his last) called "Oh, the places you'll go!" and today I realize that I may not have gone to all the grand and glorious places in the world.  I may not have found the success that I often thought would come.  But I have been places.  Both in the world and in my spirit.  Places that have allowed me to roam free, yet also find someone to roam with.

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My eyes grew big at the sight of him.  We were walking through the night along the mall below the Washington Memorial.  There he sat.  A man who I feel had also roamed.  He wasn't a success story at first.  In fact, he was quite the failure as a politician.  But he had a passion and a drive that carried him from simple roots to being enshrined as one of our most beloved historical figures.  Lincoln sat looking at me through the darkened sky...

I will continue to roam and find new places.  I'm still finding where this path is taking me and I'm open to see all the wonders - even if it's just looking in the mirror and seeing a face that has shed some tears, but still continues to believe.  And it's nice to think of another's hand coming up and taking mine in theirs.  Just a super added perk to the journey.