Looking Up

I looked at her, eye to eye.  And I knew.

I wanted more with her from the night we sat and talked under the stars.  She took my breath away.  I found her pain to be part of me.  Her joys were ones I wanted to share.  I looked into her eyes and saw something...

...maybe...

...my future.

So fast forward.  Seven months later and it hasn't changed.  Well, that's not entirely true.  I find that in everything - the tears we've both shared, the things that have already challenged and asked more of us - I find my heart still growing WITH her!

I'm not "home" tonight.  Whenever she's away I know that part of me is resting somewhere else.  But my love, this lady that I want to find solace with is still resonating inside me.  I'll be 'home' when we're both back together.  

I'm so aware of the impact this has had on my life.  I am still growing into letting one other person really and truly get to know me.  FAULTS and ALL!  I have been a nomad, a wanderer through most of my life.  I sought something concrete and real, but couldn't let my own pain be seen by anyone.  

So I heard her voice on the line.  It was late the next night, and we talked throughout the night.  

I am still realizing that there is a better place.  This place where my heart wants to, and can finally start to let go - to not worry and doubt.  And I'm sitting writing.  My voice is being heard - even though it's strained from years of misuse.

So I'm looking up.

And loving the view!