WEEDS

I've always wanted the love story.

It has been the one thing that has driven me for most of my life.

But there is a difference between romance and love.  Between those first moments of infatuation and lust to the true deeper devotion and dedication to another person that comes from a lifetime.

The poet in me thrives on romance and the thought of the magic that comes from someone who just messes with your insides and lights you on fire.  And that fire won't die within me, the desire to still light the night with the love shared with someone so special.  It is a part of the makeup of who I am.  I’ve always known this – just never experienced it.

But…

The realist in me knows that there is so much more than just these moments.  There are times when it's hard. There are times when you're sick, where you're aching - when one if you is hurting.  There are times where all the reservoirs inside you that have been so full at times are drained to almost empty.  I've seen many people walk away at these moments.  I've actually been a in a relationship that it ended because there wasn’t anything to hold on to - because it wasn't true.

Decision is really this,  do you want just a small flame that flickers out with the first blow of the wind, or a raging, burning fire the can't be put out no matter how much the forces around you blow on it, trying to just vanquish it.

I found the love that I've always wanted.  I’ve documented it here on this blog and on Facebook and so many other ways.  I'm sure that some of you out there may even get tired of seeing the pictures and the comments.  But I don't care!

I find myself quiet today.  Not wanting to say too much, because I just know that I’m tired – that I’m drained.  In these moments,  I want to be the devoted man and soon-to-be husband.  My insides may be running low, but that doesn't take away how I feel and what I desire - what I want with the person that I love.

It's funny, I know spring is almost here, and I was outside yesterday working on weeds.  Have to keep taking care of the things that matter to you. You can't let them go, and you can't let them just not be seen or heard.  If you love someone, let them know.  Just let them know your heart and let them know that you care about them and that you will be there for them.

The weeds that I've been pulling have such a small root and come out quickly and easily - just takes a little time on your hands and knees, and then putting down something to keep them from coming back once they wither away.  Inside my heart there's something much deeper.  It's more like the roots of a large oak that spread on the ground below our feet that can't be seen. It's still growing and it's still really young, but I know that there is something truly deep there that is just waiting to build deep, deep roots and bloom.