Holding Out for a Hero

I've always wanted to be a hero.  Maybe it's just my extremely over-romantic nature, or the fantasies I lived with inside my head growing up and still sometimes do today. But I've always wanted to be somebody's hero.  Still do.  Not to wear a cape or to save the day, but to be there.  To be solid: something more for someone. And even though Heroes fail us, they do (think Ben Affleck being Batman, and if that's not a fail!!!!).  But they get back up and they continue to be more than just the day to day.  Sometimes they become so much more by just being who they are, nothing more.  If you're willing to really see who they are!

I've never ridden a horse well enough to even consider being a white knight, and in fact I'd probably be riding a jack-ass more than a horse.  But if I had to, I would ride it.  And I would do my best to stay mounted in the saddle while...

Failing.

And I fail.  I've failed many, many times.

So Bonnie Tyler.  You have inspired this.  From Footloose to the intro credits of a local wresting show growing up, you have inspired since I was a middle schooler.  But you were off a little, and I hope to expose the true hero while not totally destroying such a kick-ass song!

Somewhere there is someone still holding out for their hero. But not a mythical man on a fiery steed, with a whip (see the video) and glowing chaps and stetson.  Good men? Yes.  Gods? Maybe one. Streetwise Hercules?  Well Arnold is in California or making really bad movies these days.  Strong, Fast, Fresh from the Fight? Probably.  Sure? Absolutely.  Soon? Yes, please.  Larger than Life...

Larger than Life.

No.  Not Larger than Life.  Just "part of life".

Maybe it's just running to help with a flat tire, or doing the dishes. HERO OF DISHDOM!!  

Here's what I am.  
I'm real.  Pretty damn real.  Sometimes ugly real, but not mean.

I don't always do things the right way.  I forget things with my "squirrel" mentality...  where were we at?  I love, and I've lost more times than I care to think about right now.  Lost again.  I'll try to help.  I'll try to find the things that make others happy, and I'll sacrifice when I can for those I love, be it family or friends.  Enemies. Sometimes even strangers.

One night I was working with the homeless with my uncle down in Atlanta.  This was prior to the Olympic "revitalization" (i.e. move out all the distraught and downtrodden to clean the city).  We found a guy laying in some bushes without any pants on.  Just tattered rags that must have once been jeans.  I immediately pulled off my sweatpants (Yes, I had shorts on underneath) and handed them to him, even helped him put them on.  We were able to get that man off the streets that night.  Maybe he came back, but I remember taking him to the bus line that would transport some of the homeless to a safe house if there was room.  My uncle would tell people that I took my pants off without putting in the part about having anything on underneath - Ugh - Andy!!!

This isn't a pat on the back.  Everyone, I'm pretty broken of some of that.  I'm not really hero material.  I'm scarred.  I'm emotionally beaten up.  But you know what, I still get my ass out of bed every day.  I go to work.  I try to take care of my kids.  I try to be a good friend.  I still hope for more.  I even pray, though I do sometimes question if the Big Guy hears...

I'll never live up to the song.  But maybe, just maybe I can be a little something for someone -maybe through a smile for a good deed.  Giving a street performer/friend a really good tip, just because he might need it more than me.  A hug for a friend in need.  

Or maybe I'm totally on the wrong side of this.  Maybe I damn well need a hero too!  Maybe I've been holding out my entire life for my own hero.

I want someone to believe in a little. Who cherishes all my quirks and idiosyncrasies without judging them as changeable.  A friend who really gets ME. 

I don't need to be fixed.  I am perfectly flawed just the way I am.  

I'm holding out.............

VIDEO - HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO